The Wattle day that never was (almost)

I awoke this morning to the buzz of a chain saw next door. The sun was shining, a gorgeous morning indeed, the beautiful song of an Australian magpie was rising above that other rude sound. It was 9am. I had slept in beautifully. I leapt out of bed, showered,and put on my Sunday finery for church.
After telling my wife it was time to get up, I went out to survey this beautiful morning. To my surprise, there was a rolled up newspaper on the front lawn. We don't get the Sunday paper, this was a surprising development. I peeled of the glad wrap from the paper to discover that it was a Saturday paper. How odd, I thought to myself, "why on earth has that happened"? I was even more perplexed when I looked at he contents of the paper and realised I had not seen these articles yesterday. Things were just getting curiouser and curiouser.
My wife came out to the kitchen and I asked her, "Did we get a paper yesterday"? She said, "Yes". I said, "Well they have left us another one today, and it is a Saturdays paper". My wife's reply was as startling as it was illuminating, she said "It is Saturday".
It took a few moments to absorb this truth, and its implications.
It was indeed Saturday, It was also the first day of Spring, and what's more, it was Wattle Day. It was the day I had been waiting for, and I nearly missed it altogether

It was just a couple of days ago that I visited a Neurologist. As I was returning home I stopped to photograph just any old Wattle tree for my blog, not a great picture as I had to jump out of the way of some mad motorist as I snapped it.
Talking about this Nuerologist coot, he took just on seven minutes giving me electric shocks to tell me that I had severe Carpal Tunnel in both hands. I got his bill post haste, like next day. I am still smarting over the fact that he charged me $30 per minute. This made me feel a little better for charging people $30 and hour for repairs and restoration.
My wife is already convinced that this warrants an operation or two. My thoughts are that a little Elmore Oil might just do the trick. After all,this oil has fixed up a trigger finger in spite of Doctor Nick's dogmatic statement that no amount of rubbing oil into it would do any good at all.